Captain’s Log 6,120
I got a spur of the moment invitation to go see a movie last night. I picked Star Wars because I figured it is something I should see to keep up my vast warehouse of cool cultural shit up to date. I picked it. It’s all my fault.
I did not find it to be a bag of chips. It was a shoot ’em up and chase ’em down movie like so many others. There was some tender memories of parenting tossed in to make us weepy. That was lost on me. I was too busy slamming down the can of diet ginger ale I sneaked inside.
The theatre we went to has installed DBOX seating in certain rooms that show high-action films. You pay more. I don’t know how much more, but the seats are kind of ridiculous. You have to be at least 5’8″ on your feet won’t touch the floor. In this particular room, the “special” red seats took up the entire middle section of the house. About 40% of the seats were marked. And forbidden to us schleps who paid regular price.
DBOX seats rattle and roll and shake. If you sit in your living room long enough in southern California, and earthquake will hit and you can feel the same thing for free.
Some people came in and sat in the red seats they had obviously paid for. The lady’s feet didn’t even come close to touching the floor, so the moved into regular schlep seats in front of us.
The whole Star Wars thing is nothing more than a standard tragic Greek story about being lost, being found, falling from grace, finding grace, killing thousands of people, dealing with monstrous creatures, stealing lots of stuff, and desperately trying to be a hero and saving mankind. The battle scenes went on and on. And on. And on even more.
The film introduces a new bad guy.
I call him Darth Vader Lite
Bad guys seem to love talking through voice modifiers. Maybe it’s a science fiction thing. Maybe they are in the witness protection program.
George Lucas wasn’t too thrilled with this film either. And I totally understand why. As a storyteller, this film is sorely lacking.
“Poop on Disney!” (not a real quote but close to how he feels)
I did use my popcorn pass. Used it twice and it’s already 50% paid for. Best deal in town.