We Are Becoming Disrespectful Ninnies

Captain’s Log   6,031

Enough already!


Not sure I like where all of this is going.

walk tesxt

Constantly checking our devices.

We are so disconnected.  I don’t see how this makes us closer.  I see it as isolating.  Yes, we are learning a lot and communicating with technology….but does that take the place of this?


Imagine.  Eating together and sharing real-time conversation.


I’ve certainly done my fair share of this.


Geocaching with a group of friends.  Nothing better.

So here’s an idea.  If you are with phone freaks at dinner, ask everyone to put his or her cell phone on the table.  Nobody can touch the phones during the meal.  If someone “cracks” and picks up their phone, that person has to pick up the entire check for the whole table.  Including tip.

phooon tabs

Clever idea.  I have heard it works.  I have a few friends who are constant phone checkers.  They pretend NOT to be, but if I go to the restroom, I often find them doing a furtive check before they realize I am coming back to the table.  Sometimes, I change my “route” and enter from the other direction (if possible).  It’s fun to catch them in the act and listen to the lame-sauce excuses.

I use my phone for both business and personal use.  I leave it on all the time.  When I feel it vibrate, I do look at the screen.  If it is work-related or something personal I must attend to immediately, I excuse myself and take care of business away from the table.  I NEVER make cell calls at the table, in anyone’s living room, etc.  If I must return a text, I ask for a gracious pardon and answer quickly.  I never engage in text conversations in the presence of others.  And I  answer work texts quickly and discreetly when I am with other people.  Personal matters can wait unless they are emergencies (like the airline letting you know your flight is leaving two hours AHEAD of schedule).

We are losing our sense of courtesy.  That makes me sad.

When I am on the road and going down a lonesome highway in the middle of nowhere, there is nothing nicer than seeing OUT OF CELL RANGE on my phone.  Truly.  I mean it.


Filed under Captain Poolie's observations

19 responses to “We Are Becoming Disrespectful Ninnies

  1. Stephanie

    I have a smartphone that hardly ever leaves its charger. What a waste of money.

  2. I have a phone and check it when I get off work and when I’m on my way to work. If I get a call I glance at it – if it’s my family I answer. Otherwise, no. I have started using some of the apps to make money; otherwise, I literally tend to forget it’s there. And this is my brand-new, so-glad-to-get-it phone.

  3. agreed, especially about table manners

  4. That’s a great idea. And I agree with Dangerspouse.

  5. I understand this angle. Since I have moved deeper into the country, I feel terribly isolated. It is a long drive to where any of my friends live. I am so thankful for social media for my friend’s occasional updates.

    • poolagirl

      Social media is one thing. Hanging on the phone 24/7 is another. I have made great connections through this journal, but I use the time here wisely. At least I hope I do!

  6. bholles

    Totally agree with you. Hate it when people I am with are looking at the phone all the time.

  7. Patty O"

    You are so right. The whole “connected” thing has grown absurd. I have an old flip phone that my children insisted upon because “Mother goes to the Opera” business and them worrying about me out at night alone and in need of AAA… I have never replaced it because IT ISN’T BROKEN. (Yes, I am of THAT generation.) I turn it on when it is convenient for ME. I do not text and do not want to. And at the dinner table? NEVER. Not at my home and not in my children’s homes either. We converse. It’s lovely.

  8. farmgirl

    Paula, there is a wonderful book out there addressing just this issue, called “Alone Together” By Sherry Turkel. Have you read it? It was spot on and we should be worried. We are forgetting how to talk to each other. By using our devices to communicate, whether it is to say hi, get mad, get together, break up, or share amazing news, we lose a huge human element not seeing the people’s faces. Not seeing their anger or anguish or joy or tears. A couple !!!!! just doesn’t cut it. We will, I believe, forget how to have true human emotions. It scares me. And is fast becoming a cause I feel so passionate about that am unable to keep quiet about. I love my devices as much as anyone. We just have to figure this out. We are losing our human connection.

  9. This has been one of my more recent “issues.” Fortunately, I don’t live via the phone. I put it away when I go to bed. Then when I remember in the morning, I get it out of the drawer it was in. My friends don’t seem to have it attached to their ears but I am amazed at how often they have a call from a family member which “has to be taken immediately”. I think between computers, cell phones and interactive games, we are all losing our ability to talk out loud! LOL.

  10. I don’t get it. I don’t even HAVE a phone, and I’m still a social pariah.

    • poolagirl

      Wow! They don’t make you carry a cell for your job?

      • Nope.

        (I actually have a small phone-only cell phone that wifey gave me in case I ever get stuck on the road at 3am on my way to work. She pays 25-dollars every 3 months to get it filled, but I rarely use the phone even once, so it’s wasted. In fact, the last time I made a call it had been so long that I forgot how to turn it on. I actually love being incommunicado after doing nothing but talk for 8 hours every day. I’d throw away my home phone too if I had my way….)

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