Snotball at Home Depot

Captain’s Log   5,784

A little snotball at Home Depot made an unwanted comment to me last night.  I had a meeting later in the afternoon, and I stopped by the store to pick up bird supplies.  The pigeons are gone so  I can safely feed the finches, sparrows, and many others who visit my yard.  I bought five bags of peanut suet pellets.  I have a suet pellet feeder, so it only makes sense that I would buy suet pellets.  Five bags will last me about 2 months.  I also had 10 pounds of Nyjer thistle seed and 20 pounds of black oil sunflower seeds.

The cashier looked at me and said, “You bought too much food.  You shouldn’t spoil your birds like that.”


Since when is it a cashier’s business how much bird food I buy?  She has no idea how much I feed at a time or how often.  She doesn’t know how many birds visit my little paradise either.  What a little poop!

It’s that kind of intrusion into my life that makes me insane.  I do NOT want people to come at me unannounced and offer advice or faux wisdom about that I do.  I FOOKIN’ HATE THAT!  And when people do that, it is my basic nature to resist them completely.  Unless I am in danger of blowing up my car, walking through a miasma of plague, or falling out of a 20-story window, I really want people to just shut up and leave me alone.

Stay out of my bird food buying decisions!

So I got in the car and headed home.  It was dark.  I entered a really dark freeway ramp (for the locals who read here, it was Balboa eastbound onto the 805 southbound).  As I was picking up speed on the ramp, a man (on foot) dressed in dark clothing appeared out of nowhere and crossed right in front of me.  I slammed on my brakes.  The car behind me slammed on his brakes and ended up beside me in the carpool lane – fortunately not in my back seat.  The pedestrian then turned, flipped us both off, and yelled “Fucking losers!”

As far as I know, a freeway ramp is considered part of a freeway.  That man had no business crossing it like it was a city street.  Dark as pitch out there and wearing black clothing.  I was certainly not expecting him to appear off to my left side and casually walk in front of my car.  I was going at least 40-45 miles an hour.  I would have killed him for sure.

I was just glad to get home.  I made myself a light meal and read magazines while glancing at the Olympic coverage.  I sympathized with Bob Costas and his pinkeye troubles while he tries to anchor the Olympics.  He probably splashed some of that orange water in his face.


I went to bed and dreamed I was running a coffee cart in Sochi.



Filed under Captain Poolie's observations

18 responses to “Snotball at Home Depot

  1. Why didn’t you ask her why she thought that? Yup, certainly unwarranted, but not as dangerous as that other guy’s unwarranted flip off. Have you seen the homeless encampment with tents in the middle of 94?

  2. what the sam hill?! A cashier who DOWNsells, AND thinks she needs to “shame” a customer for friggin feeding birds?! Ridiculous. what, did she read somewhere that people who feed birds are in some jacked up way ENCROACHING upon the birds’ natural foraging behaviors, HARRR, yes, that is what we are encroaching upon…smh… kudos to you for keeping your zen and not throttling the stoopid

  3. Ter

    In all the time I worked retail, especially when I was selling a particular line of jewelry whose name heavily references a certain woman and her box of evil, I never once judged a customer on the purchase made. Did they always choose something I liked, be it theme or color? No. Did they make the “right” references with some pieces? No. Was it my place to say so? NO! Just make the damn sale and move on. Good gravy, why people feel the need to voice every thought they have… oh wait, we can thank FB and Twitter for that!

    Maybe I’m backwards, but I loved hearing customers’ stories as to why they chose a particular piece over another. Based on what they told me, then I’d make suggestions and, many times, they’d buy *more* than they’d intended or came back because of our conversation. Cheezits crackers, some people are thick…

    Sorry, didn’t mean to rant!

  4. poundheadhere

    That cashier was rude as heck, and my guess is that her boss might want to know about it. I’d guess he or she would take issue with the cashier trying to talk you out of a sale

  5. Go watch “Death Race 2000” again. Pedestrians are worth 300 points.

  6. Could have told her it’s your new diet……and then asked for the manager~ !

  7. Patty O'

    Sounds like it was a good time to go straight home, lock the door, and hunker down!

  8. Between the people who are telling me what not to buy (I don’t anyway) and the ones who are trying to sell me what I don’t need (no car insurance, ’cause I have no car!), I have taken to not answering the phone.

  9. Penny Tushingham

    The cashier should have said “your have very lucky birds”! People, I am reaching the end of my rope with them!!!!!!

    Pen Pen

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