Captain’s Log 5,686
I am not like other people. Not at all. I have always felt like the oddball, and that was made very clear to me in recent days. I think differently, I act differently, I talk differently.
I can geek out like this without any problem whatsoever. Maybe even worse than the lady in this photo!
I spent most of the weekend wondering if differences are really that important. I started trying to “measure up” to the people I was spending time with. It was interesting. It’s an exercise I put myself through at the most befuddling times.
I am not rich
I am not beautiful
I don’t have a big, expensive house
I never had a big-dollar job in my life
I drive a simple car
I never had the gorgeous family with a successful husband and top-notch children
I would rather read than party
I wear simple jewelry
I am completely unsophisticated with food and wine
I just need to face the fact that I am odd. Just odd. Instead of wanting to engage the people I’m with about the merits of Harper Lee’s influence on American literature, I should just shut up and coast through the experience. Instead, I have a tendency to feel “less than” the others.
Oh yes, I have heard all about the things I do have. Sometimes, that feels just like people telling a fat guy he doesn’t sweat much. Sometimes, I just want to be exotic and elegant. When you consider the raw material, that ain’t ever gonna happen. I need to go Zen with my coping skills right now.