Captain’s Log 5,658
I am usually so calm and collected. Until someone takes advantage of me or my generosity. Then the gloves come off and I bite back.
There was an event behind the museum last night. Here’s how it scoped out.
Usual charge for the space $1,000 Cost to the client $0
Usual cost of tables $50 Cost to the client $0
Usual cost of security $50 Cost to the client $0
Usual cost of extra chairs $25 Cost to the client $0
We usually allow free use of the museum restrooms, but the client opted to use the public restrooms on the side of the building. Whatever. It was his gig and we were donating everything.
So I was standing there watching people set up crock pots when this haughty and arrogant woman came up and demanded to know where the restrooms were. I told her in a very kind voice that the client (the president of the club who was sponsoring this all for free so she could have a fookin’ free meal in a beautiful park surrounding) had chosen the public restrooms right next to the building.
She went off on me like a rocket. She bitched about how “inconvenient” that was and what kind of rinky dink museum would be so cheap? Yadda Yadda Yadda. She said some more very disparaging remarks about how stupid the set up was, why were they serving HOT DOGS FER CRISSAKES! She was one of those. Nothing was right. Nothing was good enough. I knew if I tried to approach her as Zen Poolie it would flop. Besides, I didn’t feel like Zen Poolie in that moment. I felt like Shit Upon Poolie right then, and I snapped. I stepped right into her comfort zone, looked her right in the eye, and asked, “Do you know who are talking to?” Actually, I didn’t actually say it. I mostly yelled it. I then introduced myself and claimed my rightful spot as the keeper of the museum. Mine. Not hers. Mine.
I won. Nobody ever expects wrath from me. I just don’t come across as a wrathful person. Not even to strangers. But when it comes to insults, that’s another story. I don’t abide insults well. I see red.
Nothing would have been good enough for that woman. If it hadn’t been the restrooms, she would have bitched about something else. I know the type. No matter what you do, you are in a lose/lose with them. They will examine and pick apart everything you say and do – and then crow to anyone who will listen about what an awful person you are. They have no boundaries for their rude and insolent behavior. Maybe she wanted everyone in range to hear her whine and bitch so they would feel sorry that this able-bodied woman had to walk around the corner to use a public restroom facility. If she was in a huff, she should have bitched to the guy who was throwing the event, not the person who had donated everything.
Those who will bitch no matter what. So tedious for me. That’s how they get fuel for their soul. It gives them substance. It creates an identity. Some sort of archetype character they mirror. I know that the woman’s actions last night were driven by fear. Most difficult people in the world are reacting to huge fears. I could have been more sensitive, but I wasn’t. I didn’t take the time to see beyond her frightening presence to understand the situation. Sometimes, I just get tired being so understanding and accommodating all the time. Sometimes, I just need to get mad and do a little roaring on my own terms.
So be it.