A Premiere Flash

Captain’s Log  4,535

Funny how things show up when you pay attention to them.  Just yesterday I was talking about wanting to see Anne Hathaway getting her hair cut off with a knife in Les Miserables.  Lo and behold, since she was on my mind, I came across this interesting headline online this morning.

Anne Hathaway

Flashes Her Vajayjay

At The Les Misérables 

Premiere!

Oh, that Anne Hathaway!  When one is wearing faux gladiator boots/shoe combo to a movie premiere where you play a golden-hearted whore, it is best to be mindful of the fact that you are commando under your very skimpy dress.

anne-hathaway-flashes-paparazzi-crotch-les-miserables-premiere__oPt

How unfortunate.  She is going to be remembered for this.  Just like Sharon Stone (only different).

I had a wardrobe malfunction once when I was teaching a group of 4th graders how to folk dance.  My tights fell down.  I had several other wardrobe malfunctions later in my “upscale” career.  One of them involved losing a half-slip in the middle of the street whilst pushing a TV across the street on one of those TV cart things.  I learned the value of never wearing skirts or dresses to work again.  And I never have.  And I haven’t lost a slip since.  I have worn skirts and dresses since that awful day, but not very often.  I worry so much about catastrophes that it just isn’t worth it.  I can’t handle the pressure.

Here is a list of things that make me feel pressured and insecure.

Cooking for people who really know how to cook

Trying to ski

Going to parties

Trying to learn another language

Driving someone’s car when they are sitting in it

Being in a meeting with a group of alpha dogs

Being around people who take themselves seriously

Hugging people I don’t know (ICKY)

Most of the time, I can just suck it up and get through whatever I need to get through.  But…there are times…..

I almost called someone a humorless twat yesterday, but then I thought the better of it.  It was SO there on the tip of my mind.  I was on the phone with one of those type A women who never smile and just push agendas around like brooms.  They don’t even have one polite moment to say “How are you?”  Everything is business business business.  Can’t stand that.  She is a cohort of mine, but I have never liked her.  Metabolism of a hummingbird (and as frantic), lifeless hair and wardrobe, and she peers over her reading glasses all day long – making sour faces.  No laughing or smiling.  She actually looks a bit like Margaret Hamilton in The Wizard of Oz.

margaret hamilton

Just add the glasses.

As my spiritual friends would say, I get to CHOOSE how I deal with this person.  That is absolutely correct.  And I CHOOSE to not deal with her whenever possible.  Some would even say I actually CREATED her and brought her into my life to teach me a lesson.  Hmmmm….that is going to take some thinking.  If I actually did that, I need my head examined.

18 Comments

Filed under Captain Poolie's observations

18 responses to “A Premiere Flash

  1. Why or why do women think it is so great to go commando…especially a celebrity?……maybe because she lost so much weight, she couldn’t fall out of the top of her dress so she decided to flash at the bottom…..euuw!

  2. goatbarnwitch

    Well, losing a slip or tights may be embarrassing but at least you still had the skirt on but Ms Hathaway should consider the wisdom of going commando when wearing a dress that clearly is slit up to the ….. Commando requires a solid piece of fabric all the way around unless you don’t mind a photog getting a shot like that. I have to wonder what the public and the media will stare at next

  3. stepfordtart

    Hahahahaha! “driving someone else’s car while they are sitting in it”! Oh, the horror! When I test drove my Mazda I just KNOW the guy selling it was thinking “OMIGOD, has she even passed her driving test????” You just forget EVERYTHING you ever leaned about driving, dont you. Hideous, utterly hideous. s x

  4. farm girl

    Ummmm…nope…can’t say that….ummmm…nope…that either…hmmmmm….okay…I do wonder how a photographer just happens to be there at that precise moment, getting that precise angle? See how good I was at not saying all sorts of things that popped into my head? Because that picture really did open up (snort) a chance to make all sorts of comments!

  5. Sorry, but you don’t go commando to a premiere unless you’re intentionally courting controversy. I always appreciated the fact that Ann Hathaway kept a fairly respectable tone for Hollyweird. So sorry to hear she changed her tune.

    • poolagirl

      I am doing voice to text here so bear with me. Panties are essential that movie premieres. It was wrong for her to show her but JJ like that. I should do all my comments this way. It is fucking hilarious. I said who can. Hello again. Cock fucking. This has just become X-rated. Then again so are and Hathaway’s panties. Or should I say lack of panties.

  6. You are just too funny. Yes, good list. Yup, I’m very uncomfortable at parties. Did one of us say that?

  7. Rhonda

    I just LOVE LOVE LOVE Margaret Hamilton!!!!!

  8. You reminded me of a term that I heard some thirty years ago. Someone called a woman a TWA-coffee (as in stewardess).

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s