Captain’s Log 4,473
This is it! The final installment of the I Think I Look Like Angela Lansbury With Fifty Shades of Grey contest is here! There is no turning back time. No more emailed photos. We hit seventeen and that’s where we will stay. I want to thank everyone for participating as a “contestant.” I also want to thank everyone for reading and commenting. Even though there is no socially redeeming value to this, it really WAS a lot of fun.
So……drum roll for the final entry! I present to you…..a friend from across the pond. Sassy, funny, musically gifted, and sexy as hell……her name is Stepford Tart. I love reading about her songwriter hub unit and her great kids who like to bake in the kitchen. I also believe she drives a Mazda, so we are kindred spirits. Here goes…….
Christian never considered himself a holy man, so imagine his surprise when he came home to the $40,000,000 apartment one night to find Ana in the Play Room waiting for him. It was something he had only dreamed of. Her innocence seemed to stop her from taking the lead in their rough sex, but now…..there she was….whip ready to snap and a smoky look in her eyes that let him know she was not taking any prisoners. Adding to her incredible sex appeal was the sweatshirt she was wearing…..in a lovely shade of grey. “You’re late, Mr. Grey…” she purred. He nodded and looked shamefully at the floor. “I expect a text from you every 90 seconds when we are apart, and you have failed in your duties. You need to be……reprimanded.” She let the word fall like grace from the sky. His copper locks tumbled across his forehead and he nodded in agreement. He gazed up into her stern face and realized that the porthole behind her head made her look……halo-ish! Saintly! “My God! Ana! You are….a vision of the Virgin Mother!” Ana snorted. “After what you’ve done to me with your zip ties and your backyard toys, I will never be a virgin again, Mr. Grey.” But the halo was undeniable. She had been inducted into the army of sainthood. Harp music was faintly detected if she stopped breathing. She flexed her whip and brought the end of it under Christian’s nose for him to smell it. He swooned. She smiled. She smirked. “Yes, Mr. Grey. I am a saint now. Saint Robert of Mapplethorpe. Assume the position.” Christian looked at the whip with dread and desire. It was his big night. Chocolate sex – not vanilla this time. My inner goddess is checking to see if Mapplethorpe was famous for his flowers or….or dear…something…um….different.
OH MY GOD! I cannot believe I wrote that! So now it’s time to vote. Here’s what you do. Go to the pages listed at the top and click FIFTY SHADES OF GREY CONTEST. All the photos are posted there. At the end of the photos is the link to the survey. You may vote but only once per computer. The system is smart that way. I also included a randomizer on the questions (hope it works) so everyone’s choices will be in a different order. Have fun!