Captain’s Log 4,474
Imagine my surprise to come home yesterday and find a glorious gift from my pal Miss Joan! YAY! It was really really heavy, so I couldn’t even imagine what might be inside! I got a cold soda and a knife and went out to the patio and set to work opening the box.
It was like a clown car! More and more and MORE things were inside! And yes, Miss Joan certainly DOES appreciate the absurd gifts mothers are known to give their adult children. Behold.
A pirate coffee cup (YARRR), a snowglobe that allows you to insert your very own picture and then shake it and make it look like snow in their faces……AND…..the best…..a shitload of artificial flowers. I think they are meant to go around pillar candles.
What a pirate booty haul! What magnificent “stuff!” I simply cannot wait to do something amazing with 500,000 artificial flowers! Thanks, Miss Joan! You made my day.
What she fails to realize is….the game is on. Bwa ha ha ha ha!
I could make this into an enormous geocache and hide it in her shrubs. Bwa ha ha ha! With a note that says, “Hidden with permission of the property owner. Please ring the doorbell. The mistress of the house will answer and give you coffee and cookies. You will then be invited to join her for some rousing folk songs in the parlor.” But the cup is sacred. MINE!