Fifty Shades of………….

Captain’s Log  4,412

Certain folks out there will get a hoot out of this.  A hoot.  Good lord, I sound like someone who lives in a remote cabin in the north woods of Wisconsin.  Hoot?  Yes, I do use that word every now and then.  Anyway….on to the Shakespearean fun.

I tossed back my mane of hair, my mouth agape with the howl of mine primal heart.  I thought it was a hoot. 

This was a hoot too.  I bought it on a whim yesterday and read it last night.  Don’t be impressed.  It’s about 35 pages long.  35 very funny pages.

Another hoot

Actually, if you don’t read much, this parody wouldn’t be a hoot.  It wouldn’t even be mildly amusing.  The book pokes huge fun of famous authors in a derivative,  spanking in the elevator kind of way.  I am thinking of writing my own parody called Fifty Shades of Henna.  I could set it in a hair salon.  I’m sure Joanie would help me with the finer details.  I don’t know much about the sexual potential of mixing colors, etc.

There are other Fifty Shade titles that also made me laugh.  I am guessing their content.

Fifty Shades of Beige – growing up in Norway

Fifty Shades of Lame – the life of Lindsay Lohan

Fifty Shades of Black & Blue – the life of a professional kick boxer

Fifty Shades of Earl Grey – the life a British slutty pie

Actually, Big Sister Mia and I went to Costco the other day.  She said she wanted Fifty Shades of Grey.  She headed off for the restroom and I found the books.  I tossed it into her cart.  She said, “Do they have the rest?”  Sure enough.  She bought all three…..AND….she is planning to read them out of her regular rotation.  She has this enormously complex system of storing and reading books.  Most of the books she buys now will be read 18 months from now.  But not these.  They got a line pass to move to the front.

It’s Freakish Tuesday at the museum AGAIN.  June is always a huge month, and with Steampunk already breaking attendance records, this will be quite a day.  I doubt if I will even have a moment in my office.  We will spend all day policing the floor as security guards.  Not fun.  Not a good use of anyone’s time.


Filed under Captain Poolie's observations

19 responses to “Fifty Shades of………….

  1. Actually I think Joanie would be perfect for writing Fifty Shades of Gray. And red. And blond. I’d like you to write Fifty Shades of Pirate; Fifty Shades of Cars; Fifty Shades of Chocolate Milk. The possibilities are endless.

  2. “spanking in the elevator” Now THAT is a hoot 😀

  3. Steph

    I parked, I walked, I tried…but the bee’s got there before me…..

  4. Hahaha! Loved the Shakespeare Hokey Pokey! Also meant to tell you a while ago (but forgot), one of Sis’s friends went to your steampunk exhibit! She said it was JOLLY good. Sis is visiting with her in October but I guess it ‘ll be long gone by then. : ( s x

  5. Well, I’m up and running again AND have a cursor. WOW. Slowly signing in to everything again too.

    Yes, dinner next week?
    Derivative,,,,oh, you are good. Nice word.

  6. Mia

    It will take a lot for me to read out of order. I am so rigid on how I read my books but I will try.

  7. I can’t imagine what Mia is going to say when she gives her review of those Fifty Shades of….. Personally, I am not interested in reading them. but I would be interested in reading your Fifty Shades of Henna…..I’m sure Joanie has plenty of stories to help fill those pages….

  8. Sometimes I wonder whether some of these … odd … books aren’t written just as fodder for the satirists.

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